A STUPID BASTARDOUS LORE STORY, WHICH SHOULDN'T BE A CANON IMO

~ ONE DAY AT BASTARD GAN PUNK CLUB, THERE IS A FEAST. ALL BASTARD GAN PUNKS ARE DOING THEIR YEARLY BIG GATHERING IN THE BIG ROOM WITH SHITTON OF SNACKS AND CARROTS. THEY ARE ALL EATING SHIT LIKE CRAZY AND IN THE ROOM YOU COULD HEAR THE ECHOES OF CRACKLES && LAUGHTERS && RANDOM PUNK SONGS.

SUDDENLY THE DOOR SLAMS OPEN. THERE APPEARS THE SILLUETTE OF A VERY BIG BASTARD BEING. BASTARD GAN PUNKS RECOGNIZE HER A COUPLE OF SECONDS AFTER, SHE IS THE MIGHTY SENSEI BASTARD; THE MASTER OF GLITCH, BENDER OF PIXELS, MAKER OF MEANINGLESS SHIT, A TRUE NIHILIST, AND SMELLS LIKE TUNA FISH. BASTARDS ARE SHOCKED, BECAUSE SENSEI ONLY APPEARS TO ANNOUNCE AN UNNECESSARY THING IN VERY RARE SITUATIONS. SO RARE IT WOULD MAKE 10K ETH IF TOKENIZED INTO A NFT. SENSEI YELLS:

"YO BASTARDS, YOU ARE GROWN TO AN AGE I WAS WAITING FOR YEARS. IT IS TIME TO GET YOUR HANDS DIRTY, IMMA GONNA TEACH YOU HOW TO MAKE DOPE SHIT. LEMME SHOW YOU"

SHE USES A CUTTING EDGE HOLOGRAM THING TO GIVE THE BEST PRESENTATION ABOUT GLICPIX, BUT ENDS UP WITH A VERY BORING POWERPOINT FULL OF STUFF NO ONE CARED FOR.

BASTARDS ARE PUZZLED. THEY ARE LIKE "WHAT DA FUK IS THIS NONSENSE?". SOME BASTARDS START CRYING, SOME GET ON RAMPAGE, SOME BECOMES A BIG ASS NIHILIST.

SENSEI BASTARD SEES THIS SUDDEN CHANGE IN THE ATMOSPHERE, AND SIGHS AND SAYS:

"Y'ALL, YOU HAVE NO IDEA DON'T YOU? HAVE YOU EVER, FOR A FUCKING SECOND IN YOUR LIFE, LOOKED BEHIND?"

BASTARDS ALL RESPONDED AUTOMATICALLY ALMOST IN PERFECT SYNC: "BUT SENSEI, WE WERE TOLD THAT NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU TURN, YOUR ASS IS ALWAYS BEHIND".

SENSEI IS LIKE, WUT?

NONE OF THE BASTARDS HAD NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT LOOKING BEHIND. NO ONE HAD EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT THE NOTION OF LOOKING BEHIND AT ALL. THEY WERE JUST SOME FREAKIN' 2D.

THEY WERE INCAPABLE OF TURNING THEIR HEAD BACK, SO SENSEI SUMMONS A GIANT ASS MIRROR. SCREAMS ARE HEARD. THE BASTARDS' EYES WIDEN WITH AMAZEMENT. THEY REALIZE FOR THE FIRST TIME THAT THEY HAVE FUCKIN' BACKGROUNDS! A PEPEGA BASTARD SCREAMS: "OH SHIT, I AM CLEAN!", EVERYONE IS SUPER CURIOUS NOW TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW UNIQUE THEIRS ARE. SOME BASTARDS IMMEDIATELY PUT THEMSELVES ON SALE SAYING "I AM RARE AF NOW, DEAL WITH IT".

SOME BASTARDS NOTICED THAT THEIR BACK IS IDENTICAL TO WHAT SENSEI DEMONSTRATED A COUPLE OF MINUTES AGO. THEY ASK "SENSEI, WHAT IS THE MEANING OF SOME OF US HAVING WEIRDO GLICHES IN OUR BACKS?"

SHE RESPONDS "YOU ARE ASKING A NIHILIST THE MEANING OF YOUR BACKGROUND LOL. I JUST MAKE SHIT AND TEACH HOW TO DO SHIT. NOW ALL OF YOU, GIMME YOUR ATTENTION. AFTER THE END OF THIS CRASH COURSE YOU WILL BE ABLE TO MAKE YOUR OWN EXCLUSIVE GLICPIXXX. THEN YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT WITH IT.

ALL BASTARDS TAKE THEIR LEARNING POSITION (AKA SITTING CROSS-LEGGED, I DUNNO HOW THEY CAN DO THAT SINCE THEY DON'T HAVE LEGS) AND THE CRASH COURSE STARTS.

SENSEI FLOODS THEM WITH SACRED TEACHINGS OF GLICPIXXX; BENDING IMAGES, THINKING MICRO, PATTERNS, BASTARDIZING WITH GAN, MAKING GLICPIXXX DANCE.

AFTER 48 HOURS OF NON STOP MILITARY GRADE TRAINING, ALL BASTARDS ARE EXHAUSTED TO DEATH, BUT NOW THEY HAVE THE KNOWLEDGE && SKILL TO CRAFT A UNIQUE GLICPIXXX FOR THEMSELVES.

IT WAS SUNRISE. BASTARDS ALL WENT OUT TO GARDEN TO TAKE SOME FRESH AIR. THERE WAS A LEGEND IN BASTARDVERSE; THE EXISTENCE OF 48 HOLY 2D PLAINS FLOATING ON THE SKY, BUT NO BASTARD HAS SEEN THEM WITH THEIR EYES. THEY JUST APPEARED A COUPLE OF TIMES IN SOME BASTARDS' DREAMS.

BASTARDS DECIDED TO DO THE R&D AND CAPTURE ALL OF THEM. BECAUSE THEY WERE THE PERFECT RESOURCE FOR GLICPIXXX. THIS WAS THE MISSING PUZZLE PIECE. AND THOSE IMAGES WEREN'T DOING ANYTHING OTHER THEN FLOATING IN THE SKY AND APPEAR IN BASTARDS' DREAMS (OR WERE THEY?).

MONTHS LATER THEY CAPTURED ALL 48 IMAGES, PERFORMED A HUGE RITUAL TO CHOP THEM ALL INTO SMALL FRAGMENTS, UNTIL THEY HAD MORE PIXEL CHUNKS THAN THEY NEEDED. THANKFULLY THE IMAGES DIDN'T FEEL ANY PAIN, BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT LIVING OBJECTS AFTER ALL LOL

EVERY BASTARD GOT THEIR HANDS READY, AND STARTED FORGING THEIR OWN UNIQUE GLICPIXXX...